Tuesday, 31 August 2010

Two Hoodrats and One Road.....to musical hell

I had to do a post on the YouTube hit, 'It's So Cold in The D'.....long overdue but I already started writing it up a while ago lol!

OKAY...some hood looking chick from the D (Detroit, Michigan) released a tribute song about a friend who was murdered - you get the picture......the rest is viral history!!!


T-Baby 'It's So Cold in the D'
PROS

  • The fact that she was willing to embarass herself just to make this tribute song

  • The 90's vibe of the beat and the hand gestures/dances are all reminiscent of a, dare I say it, erm SWV/Aaliyah videee...oooo?? No?...Or was that just me who felt that? Moving on....
CONS

  • She can't even double up her OWN vocals in time?!?!Her adlibs and ev-er-y-thing are just all over the place.It sounds like two people trying to rap along to a Twista song at a karaoke night....but they are not in the same time zones.

  • Her shocking disregard for 1) her skin against THAT hair colour, 2) rhythm 3) English grammar ["It's so caaaaald in the D! How the $%*& do we s'pose to keep peace..."]  and 4) general decorum. Decorum, daaarling. Decorum. YES, your loved one died but do you have to swear so much?!?!? And stay IN TIME! The least you can do is let your friend rest in peace....I'd be turning in my grave if anyone EVER used my death as an excuse for this nonsense.

  • The backing dancers/homegirls look like they don't really care who died, [or who their babydaddy is]. They look bored or even slightly annoyed.... like the video took longer than expected and T-Baby was holding them back from their double date at Burger King.
Now, Shardinay.

Shardinay [SMH], Shardinay, Shardinay.
Suprisingly, some people in London STILL haven't seen this video!?!?! Which is crazy to believe seen as her video 'blew up' so quickly when it hit the net that she performed at a club in central London the following week! Even I was going to witness the wackness in full effect! THAT'S how big the Shardinay was in tha endz lol! When I first saw this video I refused to believe it was anything short of a parody video because it was so cringeworthy but as her horrible Mariah s-Carey vocals prove, she REALLY thinks she can sing?!?!

Shardinay ft Mani7esto 'Oh Boy'
PROS AND CONS [I had to combine the two because all the cons were pros and the pros were cons...lol!]

  • The first 'note' that escapes her mouth

  • The sudden tempo change of the beat is CLASSIC! It sounds like a really bad attempt to emulate an early Destiny's Child track or that the producer was inspired by someone emptying their dishwasher down a flight of stairs. Probably the latter.

  • The rapper Mani7esto's adlibs, weak verse and clothing. Both the Lonsdale and Ecko UNLTD brands are sooooooooo old skool that I bet even the bummiest of bums would find it hard to wear either brand on a cold winter's night. I can just imagine them faced with the dilemma...... "Lonsdale. Ecko. Or die......hmmm."

  • The fact that Mani7esto is spelt with a '7'

  • One of the YouTube comments about Shardinay: "She looks like Diddy Kong's Brother." OUCH.


  • Her 'choreographer' [HAHAHHAHAHA someone actually thought about these dance moves!!] is called Tipsey....the name speaks for itself...

  • The dancer on the left in the pink outfit is apparently pregnant! Now, I don't have stomach abs of steel, [I have healthy rings of jelly ;P] but still!!! Watch closely and judge for yourself....

I could go on all day about Shardinay but the YouTube comments do that for me! Me and the guys at work even made our own parody of the video and played the song at our store so you can imagine how much fun I have been making outta this....


"HHhooooOOOOOOOH BOYYYYYYYYYY!!! My singing's kinda weak....wait, wrong key..."

N.ever A.round S.orry A.gain

Shoot a rocket out my nose and call me NASA!!! The Notting Hill Carnival x Major Lazer Party put me in SUCH an energetic mood I gotta do a MAJOR post on it!!!!! But first, I'm going to do more posts in one night than I have ever done before.....it should make up for lost time...I hope.
Now for some post-carnival vibes in the key of dubstep ;P.....enjoy...


We have lift off...

Friday, 13 August 2010

You? Fantasy?.....No thanks, Bashy. I like Daydreams better.

I was going to write hundreds of posts today but I have just finished doing my hair and I've got 5hrs before I have to get up for work.


I haven't written much recently because it's all been in my head while I'm staring into the ceiling at work and floats away when I sit down to type! I have been doing full time hours for the past few weeks and .....erm ....WOW.....I am soooooooo GLAD I never signed a full time contract!!! Sleep deprivation, much? Someone ask me when I last watched EastEnders......I haven't watched my fave soap in.....ahem...a WEEK and a HALF!!!!!SHOCK HORROR....that's about 4hours catch up I have to do before over the next two days before the new episode on Monday!!!

I got loads to say but for now I gotta just talk about today....


I saw this video and instantly started laughing...I hate to do this because I don't think bashy is a bad artist but really.....WHAT THE HECK IS THIS!?!??!? His new music video for 'Fantasy' [which completely MURDERS one of my favourite 90's songs as a lil 'un, Baby D's 'Let Me Be Your Fantasy']  is straight up cheese on bread. The stills of the video on youtube made me laugh but I thought,' maybe they just caught it at a bad angle' ....






Hmmm.....


Then I watched the video [in silence because I was supposed to be working in the office].






After two minutes, I had to stop watching it......I was trying to hold in the laughter SO MUCH that I was literally sweating and losing my breath ....somehow the humour was heightened by the confused looks I was getting and it all became even more funny. Why was I finding this so funny....I know I find the humour in most cheaply made videos but this one actually had me questioning my juvenile behaviour.........is it because he is what we consider a 'rapper from the streets' all 'Castaway' and bare foot in the sand like some toddler at brighton beach? Is it because he is all washed up.....in both senses?? Or is it because his video looks like it's jacking this dude's steez.....




ALL I gotta say is.....how 'bout you GO COMPARE your life bruv!!!! When your music video starts to look like an insurance advert...it is .....a time to reflect.
 [And that,folks, is putting it nicely.....the sentence I wrote before REALLY boyed it....and I actually like what Bashy is doing with his life with his acting and that so I ain't gonna do him like that.....it was V.FUNNY though....].



It's now 4am....why am I still on this....now I have 4hrs worth of sleep to bang out....